You’d rather not hear it now? But I want you to hear it. We never need to say
anything to each other when we’re together. This is--for the time when we won’t
be together. I love you, Dominique. As selfishly as the fact that I exist. As
s
...
You’d rather not hear it now? But I want you to hear it. We never need to say
anything to each other when we’re together. This is--for the time when we won’t
be together. I love you, Dominique. As selfishly as the fact that I exist. As
selfishly as my lungs breathe air. I breathe for my own necessity, for the fuel
of my body, for my survival. I’ve given you, not my sacrifice or my pity, but my
ego and my naked need. This is the only way you can wish to be loved. This is
the only way I can want you to love me. If you married me now, I would become
your whole existence. But I would not want you then. You would not want
yourself--and so you would not love me long. To say ’I love you’ one must know
first how to say the ’I.’ The kind of surrender I could have from you now would
give me nothing but an empty hulk. If I demanded it, I’d destroy you. That’s why
I won’t stop you. I’ll let you go to your husband. I don’t know how I’ll live
through tonight, but I will. I want you whole, as I am, as you’ll remain in the
battle you’ve chosen. A battle is never selfless."
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