*[A cash-ual approach** ]
[I don’t choose my movies. I only watch movies on Fri & Sat night shows. I watch from my favorite sofawala seat nos X-21 & 22. If I don’t get those seats I don’t watch the movie. Thus whatever movie is available on these two days with those two seat nos, I watch them. So if it was Red, so be it, if it’s Cash, I couldn’t care less. If I like the movie, I feel good. If it sucks, I write a review quickly. Either way it’s fun.] **This is the last & final explanation.*
*Cash** is a movie directed by the same director of Dus- Anubhab Sinha. Dus was a likeable movie with Pankaj Kapur as Jambal. I expected something like *Jambal*. What I found? Gambol.
*[Story Encashed]*
Unfortunately I wasn’t intoxicated enough to decipher even a simple story about Diamonds, nuts, crooks, cops, babes, uncles, remote control gadgets and marked dollars.
Though I could not understand fully, I could gather is it’s about a big diamond originated from India, which was divided into three small diamonds eventually, because you can’t divide a big diamond into three big diamonds.
Cape Town is the place where these diamonds are expected to re-unite under criminal supervision. The job is assigned to top criminal mastermind **Doc (Devgan)** by a “back from the dead” bad criminal **Angad (Suniel Shetty).** Surprisingly, Doc appoints & sub appoints few specialists of the trade from India, to steal a painting (why? I dunno). There’s a cash reward **(US$ 50mn)** for the job plus skimpily clad girls to dance around, in abundance.
Each & every characters had a not so perfect past, and they are gradually cooked in this khichdi- narrated by Zayed Khan to Ayesha*-in-business-class-*Takia on a flight from Cape Town (or towards it, whatever).
After lot of confusion, action, drama, car stunts, animation, suspense and more confusion the story ends taking lives of bad criminals & few cops while the good crooks come out of the fire- unhurt, unshaven & suave.
All walked to glory. I have *cashtraited* the story.
*[Cash Deposit]
***Animation**: Like *Kill Bill* & *Run Lola Run* high fidelity animation is used liberally, for many of the action sequences. Undoubtedly, the animation quality is superior (the filmmaker did the animated *Ramayan*). It also saves the director from shooting the stunts in real time. If this trend continues, all body doubles & stuntmen would be jobless soon.
*Stunts: ** Too much of it & at too many places like ***Dhoom-2***. Outstanding car chases, water scooter, parasailing, skateboards, chopper, yacht, Bungee jumps, kick in the air, **screech….crash…bang...thud **! Superb stunts are accentuated with spell bounding cinematography & multiple camera angles with action replay. Too many cars- Audi, BMW, Nissan, Merc and many more. A new vehicle was invented for this movie, like a surfboard on small wheels. The driver/ passenger has to lie down flat and it travels @ 100kmpl. This vehicle is useful to plant bombs on the cars. Awesome. Pass me the grass Director.
*Laugh :** I recall two instances where I laughed. Otherwise, I was seriously busy understanding the story. One, when Doc Devgan narrates how to start a car over cell phone explaining the “gaarrrr- poooo- ghack” technique to Samita. Another was the *“dhundla’’* guy, who was explaining the looks of Devgan to Samita & later to the police artist. That *dhundla* guy was outstanding in his short role.
*[Cash Withdrawal]*
It’s futile to describe the performances. Major performances were by the animation designer & the stunt director. I will make a feeble try to describe my take on the cast.
There was lot of characters with varying degree of **style quotient & looks**. So far I was aware about the “out -of-the bed-look”, but this movie helped me derive some more.
*Ajay Devgan** : Doc is not a doctor, he is actually an Engineer turned criminal but pretends to be a writer husband of a security honcho in Indian Embassy (Samita Shetty). He looks funny and plays with lot of remote controlled toys.
His sported a *“ Kajol-will-beat-me-to-death-if-he-sees-me-this-way” look.
*Samita Shetty: ***“Amul-macho” *look*. *The babe in baniyan. Toned body, stoned acting, honed bra-very, proned to Devgan’s pranks. Alas, she is fooled till the end and still to be continued…***
*Suniel Shetty: ***“dunno-how-to-shave-but-have-money” *look. Complete dumb in designer jackets. He was named *Angad*. Poor villain, neither does he gets the diamond, nor the money or girl- just bullets. But the chair with a checkered backdrop, nevertheless was an outstanding & extremely “graphic” scene !
*Diya Mirza: ***“My-new-name-is-Aditi”* look. Does not have much to do before getting killed by her lover Angad. She must concentrate on her future roles as kindergarten teacher or a nurse. I will award her as the “most dressed lady of the film”.
*Esha Deol: ***“Am-still-in-the-hangover-of-Dhoom2”* look. She is the lass who kicks a*s to get the cash, bash the cops to crash the car to trash. In mini skirt & pony-tail, loved by two men she drove the movie in cars. Gimme my cash back, lady.
*Zayed Khan: ***“Travelling-for-the-first-time in-business-class-with-a-tie”* look. A water ski freak who hates Ritesh, loves Esha. Dump him to recycle bin.***
*Ritesh Deshmukh: ***“Just-out-of-the-toilet-after-5-days-of-constipation”* look. Alternatively can be called as the “Scarecrow” look. He fights with Zayed, trying to look cool. Dump him in recycle bin too & then click “empty”.
*[Music- was there a cash back offer?]
**Paisa pheko, Tamasha dekho *(title song)*- dil mein hai cash, man mein hai cash, _(dash) mein bhi cash etc etc.* The good thing is if you are late in entering the hall, you can miss it. Yeah !
Rehem Karo, have mercy-* an itchy bitchy number with a dehydrated item bomb in red hot pants. I have last seen Michael Jackson doing the “-*thou shall scratch but thou shall not touch the crotch*” act.
Mindblowing mahiya*- a fast forwarded track in golden & white combination by Samita shetty. No further comments.
Background score was good, though.
*[Still reading....?** ]
Oh, you want to know the verdict?
Go watch it if you like comics, cars, Samita Shetty in baniyan, don’t want disturbance created by storyline in between action sequences and song-dance and finally have lawaris cash-in-hand. Else, watch *Dus* once again.
~uh*~
ps: The title is meaningless. Made an owl of you !
pps: Alternative titles -**Cowdung of Cashcow**, **Cashablanca**, **Cash-ew Nuts** etc.
